“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind” Bernard Baruch/Blogher18 Recap

My blogher18 tribe pic! @nerdinthecity @safia_alice @cffowler13

I wasn’t sure of what to expect from this conference since I’m not in the fashion, health or beauty industry. Honestly, I was finding a reason NOT to go. I think I’m a pretty good networker, but I can’t say that I have any interest in schmoozing with people overly obsessed with perfection and selfies! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 I wasn’t sure if it’d be the best use of 2 days time. I mean seriously, I rarely get full days to myself so I was definitely able to think of plenty of things I could do instead of going to #blogher18.

How many of you have those moments when you signed up for something or about to do something and then you flake? I’m guilty of it. I think there are definitely times where you commit to something and make a decision whether or not something is worth your time. There are other times when you keep telling yourself that something else is a better use of your time, but deep down what’s really happening is that you’re not being open to something and are trying to avoid it. That was me. So I decided I was gonna go in and make good connections and look for the good in everything! And that’s what I did.

And I walked away with so much! I connected with some truly inspiring women doing really remarkable things- 20 somethings-50 somethings, moms, entrepreneurs, self-starters, leaders- jewelry makers, marathoners, authors, inventors, designers and most importantly… DOERS! Being in the same room with that type of energy can’t be replicated through a video or Facebook group- and is an experience that really needs to be on the priority of my to-do list for my own personal growth.

When I saw the list of names of people attending the event, it was quite overwhelming. But wow! There were names I’ve never heard of and people doing great things. People you need to know about because of what they are about so here’s my ramble in no particular order:

Dr. Alaa Murabit @alaamurabit (AND she’s down with TLC!) is a global policy leader who stressed at the importance of having women of color “at the table” when it comes to global policies and peace building. I can’t remember the exact stat she shared, but there’s a stark contrast in successful programs/policies when women of color are at the table helping to make those decisions.
Monserat Adebanjo @browngirlforthearts, founder of Brown Girl for the Arts-
Nekpen Osuan, founder of @womenwerk
Angie Thomas @angiethomas, author of “The Hate You Give” which inspired the movie of the same title (she has such a light to her and I seriously wanted to grab drinks or do karaoke with her)
Gabrielle Union… @gabunion #blessed #grateful
Denise Woodard, @partakefoods founder of Partake Foods and based in Jersey City, a mom of a toddler, she took it upon herself to create snacks that are free of the top 14 food-based allergens that are delicious!
Maria Menounos @mariamenounos, both her and her mom are brain cancer survivors- Maria had brain surgery last summer and shared the importance of making her happiness and health a priority
Maria Forlio @marieforlio, founder of The B School: “Life should not be compartmentalized”
Tiffany Dufu @tiffanydufu, founder of The Cru: “If you want something you’ve never had before you’ll have to do something you’ve never done before”
Clemantine Wamariya @clemantine1, refugee from Rwanda and author of “The Girl Who Smiled Beads” https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=112&v=kiWDY01KSAA
Donna Orender, author of Wowsdom
Tiffani Thiessen @tiffanithiessen, on sharing her approach on what she’s involved with/projects that she takes on:
It has to come from the heart
It has to have meaning
It has to be something that is great, so that my children can see that I’m great and so they can see themselves be great
I mean… RIGHT??? I totally identified with her last point which is extremely important to me.

And how about the people that weren’t speakers but are women who are doing their thing and striving for greatness? I immediately connected with @nerdinthecity @cffowler13 and @safia_alice who are amazing women (because they are intelligent, gorgeous, fun and positive!) in the featured pic for this post and I am so grateful I did.

I know, I can go on and on… but what I took away was that life is too short to worry about the small shit and how much my success is influenced by those who have values that are in line with my own. There will always be things/people that get in our way. But it’s my choice on who/what deserves my time. Many times our excuse is lack of money/lack of time but it’s because we want things without doing the grind to get there. It is on me to decide what I want for my life, and live with purpose and intention to achieve that and share my light. And forget about everyone else who doesn’t uplift me in making that happen. And I need to remember to not forget to give that same support to others as well! That I’m doing a disservice to my ancestors, our loved ones and God by not being great!

Some quick quotes/notes:
Find a “joy buddy”: someone you partner with to ensure that you’re both doing things that make you joyful regularly
“Don’t compare your inside self with their outside self”
Gabrielle Union shared her thoughts on how women are 80% more likely than men to post the hashtag “#grateful” or “#blessed” This was bothersome because it implies that the women posting those hashtags didn’t earn her way to get to where they are, where as men rarely ever say that because they typically own where they are/are confident in how they achieved the success in their lives.
Become disciplined in making yourself matter
Alison Lewis, JNJ’s First Female CMO, on the work/life blend: “You can’t have it all. Having it all is a marketing ploy. Decide what your priorities are and be at peace with that.”

So what’s on your mind? How can you be great or find joy??!! Don’t be greedy with knowledge that you have that can empower others. Please share!

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